Donations come in all shapes and sizes

From time to time we all do our part for charity. I have fund raised, chaired, bought tickets to, and collected donations for the best of them. And like most, I get a bit burnt out. So now I am smarter about giving my time to a worthy cause. A trip to visit a client at her office would turn into an unexpected donation for the University of Miami. The University has a program called The Miami Project to Cure Paralysis. Which my client is part of. It helps men with spinal cord injuries father children. They have had so many successful births over the years. My client Nancy is a research scientist and has been with the project for more years then I can remember. From time to time testing is done between men who have no problems getting it um… Well you get the idea, and men who even viagra can’t help. When they moved into their new state of the art facility Nancy had invited me to see the new research center located at Jackson Memorial followed by lunch. As I took the tour, she introduced me to her colleagues showed me the new gym and then in a spur of the moment asked if I would like to be part of the study? It seems they were always short on men and had already exhausted their friends around campus. Without thinking much about it I agreed. I was then handed a cup and shown to an examining room. Your part in the study begins by you giving a sample. So there I sat with cup in hand thinking I didn’t have to pee. I just went. So I sat. About 30 minutes later Nancy knocked on the door and asked if I needed more time? As I explained to her I didn’t need to go, I heard her start to laugh and then say “not that kind of sample” It took a few seconds to register what she was asking me for. And then it hit me! “Excuse me? Um you want WHAT? In THIS cup”? She then came into the room and asked if I still wanted to participate? Then said I could watch some porn however their collection left much to be desired. “unfortunately for you it’s all straight. Not a gay video to be had. It’s next to impossible to get the University to pay for it even if it is for research” “Sure, why not. At this point in for a penny…” Watching it was like looking at an old Three Stooges episode. Lets just say that the porn they offered was anything but stimulating. To anyone! Straight or gay. So that night I called a client who runs a porn shop! The University now has a brand new DVD player along with an updated collection of DVD’s and magazines. The manager of the shop received a wonderful thank you letter from Nancy on behalf of the department. Which my client proudly framed and hung above the register. All in a day’s work I’d say.

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